Abraham sends his servant to find a wife for his son, Isaac. The man is remarkably quick about it: he
identifies Rebekah within moments of arriving in the Old Country.
Rebekah is one of my favorite characters. I love her drive to do chesed as she tends to the traveler and waters his camels. I love her self-determination, accepting the
offer of marriage on the spot. She’s upbeat and looks to the future. Rebekah’s got spunk.
Her brother Laban, however, is sneaky and treacherous. He’s dazzled by the array of gifts Abraham
offers. Even after the deal is struck
and Rebekah determined to leave, Laban and their mother declare “let the girl
stay with us another few days – ten, perhaps – afterward she may go” (Genesis
24:55).
I find that’s a pattern with negative people. Like black holes, their negativity feeds on
pulling down positive folk, draining energy.
The more energy you give them, the more they demand. They feel validated by making happy people
feel down.
Management guru Jim Collins, in his bestseller “Good To
Great,” teaches bosses that if you’d be glad to hear that someone in your
employ has resigned, you should fire them immediately. While there are important ethical obligations
and we can’t expect to like everyone in our world, the lesson is an important
one. We don’t have to allow other
people’s misery to seep into our own lives.
Protect yourself by building a barrier between yourself and them.
There’s no value in playing a role in someone else’s
drama. Although it’s not easy, don’t
stay mired in someone’s mishegas. Instead, take a page from Rebekah’s playbook. When asked if she was ready to leave home,
she answered plainly, her bag already packed:
“I will go.”
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