Rachel yearns for a child.
“Let me have children,” she demands of her husband, “otherwise I am a
dead woman!” (Genesis 30:1). Despite her husband’s love and devotion,
Rachel feels worthless without a baby.
Does she want to create life? Does
she want to give her husband a gift or to incarnate their love? Does she feel motherhood is her duty? Perhaps she wants to defeat her fertile
sister. We don’t know the cause of her
emptiness; we only know her pain.
This week, in Parshat Vayishlach, Rachel gives birth to her
second son. She dies delivering
him.
And so it is for us all.
When we have a goal and work towards it, we can be consumed with our
vision and the need to realize it. But
devotion to one cause, whatever it may be, perforce requires abandonment of
something else. We need to give up
something to get what we want.
Accomplishment brings with it lost opportunity, lost health, and lost
relationships.
When setting out towards a goal, it’s important to consider
not only what success will look like, but also what losses you’re prepared to
accept. Can you name them? Anticipate them? Feel them?
Until you do, you’re not truly ready to begin.
There is always a price to pay.
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